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I can't even imagine beginning to approach this subject with the wife!In retrospect, I probably should have waited until she had at least had her coffee.And while we are still in early days post-realization, and it's not totally stress-free (mostly just, "Gee, I hope this all works out" more than anything else but it gets a little rough every now and then), the honesty is great.Curious as to how you approached that and how it went?Also I suppose just clarifying, in my opinion, I don't necessarily see the need to talk to the wife about any of this if it is still in the 'curious' phase. I currently have no intention of telling mine as it's all theoretical (jsut as I wouldn't tell her if I was fantasizing over some hot chick, either.) Though if I do find myself in a position of acting out on some of these feelings...And I've been *very* careful to be extra thoughtful and attentive, we're going to do some marital counseling, etc, too.
I think you have to remember, in the whirl of self-acceptance and EYE CANDY EVERYWHERE that when you are married, it really isn't just about you.And the last thing ya want to do ( I am assuming) is to put her and your self in harms way of catching an STD. Coming to terms with this can be a difficult process, but you'll find this to be a supportive place. You'll always be what you always were, which has nothing to do with- all to do with- her" -from "Sorry-Grateful" from the musical "Company" by Stephen Sondheim Hey guys, loving these stories - oh how familiar! All the best..Ian, you're in the UK I think, me too. i have wanted this for so long I have had bi urges off and on for years, but now that I'm in my 40's, they've gotten strong. It's great to hear this is somewhat normal (I'm not alone!So talk with her tell her your desires and find a safe and sane (that can be the hard part) partner. And listen to what exnavyguy said in his post above- Those of us who are married and bi walk a slippery slope, and it's best to be open and honest with our wives. There seem to be a ton of ways to get to meet guy men for sex and while that may be great, it seems harder to do what I'd like to do which is to meet men in my situation..are living lives as straight men, and who want to explore their gay side, probabaly for the first time or first few times. ) Exnavy & Timmy - I give you both a ton of credit for talking directly to your wives about this.I try not to think about getting hard unless I'm in an area that is more private like a sauna.I was at the gym yesterday and saw a guy that I know from the gym.After I got out of the shower he came over and started talking to me while he was drying off.