Dating advice for shy men
Dating advice for shy men - usa adult sex live
There are a lot of benefits to being an introvert, including increased self-sufficiency, deeper relationships and a greater appreciation for subtlety and nuance, to name just a few. Pick up Susan Cain’s book to read her full, compelling argument for the power of introverts. Or Winston Churchill…) Regardless of where the quote originated, it gets at an essential truth that many of us can probably relate to: the tendency to imagine negative scenarios that will never come to pass.Here’s one of my favorite quotes, which is often attributed to Mark Twain. I’ve written before about how negative thoughts will of course come to mind – that’s totally natural, and not your fault.
My failure to understand how both those things could be true caused me a lot of cognitive dissonance and discomfort.
Naturally we’re left with the impression that this is how we should be, too.
But Cain’s book is essentially devoted to making the case that this isn’t true: introversion is not just “OK” – in its own way, it’s actually awesome.
But what I can do is provide advice for shy guys who want to get better at socializing today, rather than a decade from now.
Below you’ll find 13 lessons about interacting with other people that I wish someone had told me when I was younger.
As a result, I largely ignored the thoughts and feelings of others, which prevented me from seeing that most of them weren’t exactly social butterflies either.
I was so fixated on the (very) small number of people who actually are naturally social, I couldn’t see the hundreds of average, introverted and shy people lined up behind them.
For some reason, I had this idea in my head that most people were at least average – meaning that as someone below average, I was at a disadvantage with the majority of people I came into contact with.
But the truth was that I was so nervous about talking to other people that I retreated into myself.
You’re not the only shy, introverted person – far from it.
Next time you’re in a situation where you have to choose between keeping to yourself or striking up a conversation with a stranger, try to remember that they probably want you to make the first move as much as you want them to.
Learning that it’s perfectly possible to be introverted, if not exactly shy, alleviated a lot of anxiety for me.